Thank You!

Thank you to all those who shared kindness Because of Heller today!

With so much love and gratitude,
Heller's Family

A Kindness Message from Heller's Sister, Jenny

Just like the inseparable Raggedy-Ann and Andy, my brother, Heller, and I were best friends. Despite our six-year age difference, we could hang-out for hours.

“Jenny, can we play?” was a question I came to know very well. When Heller finally got the inevitable “yes” he had worked anywhere from thirty-minutes to two-days for, his face would light up and he would flash his brilliant smile. The rewards did not stop there. When Heller and I played, it was magical for both of us. Whether we built Lego families, played “cars with faces” and defeated the powerful evil Meme, or summoned giant monkeys, we had fun.

Not only did Heller and I learn to amuse each other, but he also loved to entertain our little brother, Nicholas. He would read books to Nicholas nonstop, and Heller didn’t have to be asked twice. He loved doing it. Heller always treated me and Nicholas with the utmost love and respect. He was always doing little things that simply made me feel good, like making pictures or Lego trophies, or having the “seamonkies” attack my bedroom.

Today’s kindness reminder is something that Heller truly knew the meaning of--respect and be kind to your siblings. Even though I sometimes have a tough time with it, each day I try to be more like Heller, treating Nicholas the best way possible. I encourage you to do something just to remind your brother or sister that you love them. You never know, you might even receive your very own Lego trophy as a result.

Kindness: Made with Love

Making gifts is fun! Giving gifts is almost as exciting as getting them. But, giving a gift that you made with your own two hands, that is a special reward of its own.

Heller loved to make gifts for his family and friends. Whether it was candy reindeer, freshly baked bread, a painted picture, or a trophy of legos, Heller made it with love and delivered it with pure joy!

The very last gift Heller gave (on the day before he joined his Father in Heaven) was a stuffed aligator from Build-A-Bear. He was convinced that his teacher could not be without a school mascot. He planned for it, did chores to earn money for it, and put it together with love. I am sure she will never forget his excitement as he presented his personal creation to her. I know I won't.

Kindness is a two-way street. The joy of giving and receiving go hand-in-hand.

Today's kindness suggestion is: Make your own gifts and give them with love. Your heart will thank you.

The Path of Kindness

So far, my kindness reminders have been easy. This one, however, is a little bit more challenging. With Kindness Day and Christmas Day approaching ever so swiftly, our carefully coordinated schedules are becoming more inflexible. This is the busiest time of the year for most of us, and we can’t imagine breaking out of routine for some unplanned occurrence.

I know that I have encouraged deliberate acts of kindness. I’ve reminded you that “practice makes perfect.” I stand by this firmly. But sometimes, someone’s need for kindness comes as a surprise.

On this day, three years ago, our family had no idea that in just two short weeks, our path would change forever. As far as we knew, our schedule was fixed. We were headed in the direction of a beautiful holiday season.

On December 22, 2007, our family found itself on the Earth’s Edge. We were lost, sometimes unable to move in any direction.

On December 22, 2007, and for many many days that followed, inflexible schedules of kind hearted friends, and even strangers, suddenly became wide open. Fixed routines became bendable. Kindness surrounded us because so many individuals stepped out of their own way to help us find ours.

For those kindnesses, we found our way. For those kindnesses, we will forever be thankful.

So, today’s kindness reminder is one I learned by heart, and I keep in my heart. I hope you will do the same. Help others find their way by stepping out of your own.

Whatever it Takes to Make Someone Happy...

Do it!

Heller knew this! Everyone deserves kindness. For some, kindness is an action, a grand gesture, a need satisfied. For others, kindness is a word, a smile, a simple acknowledgment.

Heller knew how to deliver kindness in many ways. Mommy needed a break, so Heller would read to his little brother for a while. Daddy needed Spongebob to NOT be on the television, so Heller would change the channel, when Daddy came home, to something they both enjoyed. Jenny needed a laugh, so Heller would offer up his "How do we know you are REALLY Heller dance," with signature moves that only Heller could deliver.

He "dinked" with his Mapa, endured the "broken hug machine" with his Aee, offered up "jelly" for his Papa, and "let" his Uncle Tommy win at basket ball.

Heller knew that one of his favorite teachers loved the color purple. When planting flowers in our yard, Heller would select a particularly bright, purple annual out of our arrangement to take to school the next day. He was quick to hug, happy to help, and full of kind things to say to his friends.

Everyone has a kindness need. Find it. Fulfill it. Whatever it takes!

(In case you are wondering, my need is to know that you have stopped by. I would love to hear about your suggestions for Kindness Day on December 22nd. Please leave a comment, email BecauseofHeller@aol.com, or share with us on Facebook.)

Anyone Can Deliver Kindness

How will YOU hang your star?

Count Down to Kindness

Just another day in December? Nope! If you are keeping an advent calendar, like we are, then each day is filled with a new surprise. Pictured above is our yearly advent calendar. Some years, we indulge by adding store-bought, chocolate-filled calendars to our decorating list, and some years we do not. But, this nativity advent calendar remains our favorite.

When Heller was just four years old, it was difficult to include him in the end-of-holiday clean-up. Everything had to be just so in order to pack tightly to fit into our small attic or garage. Heller so wanted to be a part of the break down—almost as much as the put-up. One day I decided to start an end-of-holiday tradition. Heller would be responsible for putting each nativity piece back into its doorway—a job he took very seriously.

For the last few years, the calendar has remained in its box. We couldn’t bear the thought that each day in December, we would be reminded that we were opening a door without Heller.

This year, we finally had the strength to pull out our calendar and we were met with something quite unexpected. December 22nd was missing its door. We don’t know why, and we do not know where the door has gone. We only know that this year, we won’t open the door without Heller. We will keep his door to kindness open—this year, and forever after.

Today's Kindness Reminder: Keep the door to kindness open!

Kindness Through Providing Books and Reading

“I get to read books to little children who cannot read!” Heller told me when he came home from school one day. The electricity that radiated his smile could have lit a thousand Christmas trees.

To have a child who loved to read like Heller was a privilege. To listen to Heller read, with beautiful intonation and expression that made the book come alive, was pure joy. But, to see the enthusiasm Heller exhibited because of his ability to share his love and talent for reading with others; that was sheer bliss.

Heller shared his gift for reading with his family too. He enjoyed sharing his stories with his sister, Jenny, and he enjoyed reading to his baby brother, Nicholas.

Walt Disney once said, “There is more treasure in books than in all the pirate’s loot on Treasure Island.” I agree.

Often, when we think of delivering acts of kindness, we think of giving of gifts—gifts of food, acts of service, and our time. Reading aloud to someone (whether a child, someone who is blind, the elderly, or even those who can read, but would benefit from your time and attention) is a gift. It feeds the hungry mind, creates lasting bonds and memories, and develops relationships. In addition, donating books to those who cannot afford their own is also a wonderful gift of kindness.
Last year, on December 22nd, several families donated books to those in need. It warmed my heart to receive letters from many individuals who were so very appreciative of this kind act.

Today’s Kindness Reminder: Kindness can be delivered through the gift of books and reading.

Carry the Burden of Another. That is Kindness.

December 2nd is here--ready or not. For many, this is a time of celebration and joy. For many others, it is a period of chaotic activity. Between working, shopping, decorating, entertaining, and maintaining a budget, emotional stress runs high.

For me, December brings a time of reflection. I tread carefully into the season. I never know when those powerless feelings of loss and anxiety will overwhelm me. I could be eyebrow high in decorations, whistling along to the latest holiday jingle, the smell of cookie dough in the air, when out of nowhere, those feelings engulf me.

I know that I am not alone.

Even before I lost my sunshine, there were burdens. Everyone carries at least a few.

This year, someone suffered a loss—a job, a loved one, a beloved pet, or even a familiar social environment (as in having moved away from home); someone is hungry; someone is sick; someone needs forgiveness; someone is homeless; someone is sad, angry, or bitter; someone is lonely.

Perhaps your burdens are light, or perhaps they are heavy, but you know that by taking on a few more of someone else’s, you will need to set aside a few of yours, and that is comforting.

Whatever your case may be, today’s kindness reminder is:

To carry the burden of another, that is kindness.

Kindness and Kisses

Heller loved our game. I can still hear him in my heart, laughing each time his bear nose clicked with mine. The magnets, secretly hidden within the snout of these lovebird bears ensured that their kisses would hold tightly together—at least until a greater force pulled them apart.

I tilted my bear side to side, pretending to create a serious dialogue with Heller’s bear. “So, as I was saying,” I would begin, “I want to share an important message with…” Before I could finish, Heller would press his bear into mine and the lips would lock. My bear was rendered speechless. Of course, my bear would object, as a woman with something to say would, but Heller would just laugh and laugh.

Oh that laughter…

It wasn’t until just last year that I noticed the bear noses formed a heart. I imagine I was too enchanted by my own heart, standing before me with his twinkling eyes full of mischief and delight, to notice.

For the last two years, each time I pulled out our bears, to begin our holiday decorating, I longed for our game. I longed for my little boy and his laughter. But, each time those lips lock together, I know the kiss is a kiss from Heller.

This year, I am able to share the game with Nicholas, Heller’s brother, who is now old enough to understand. I explained to him that our game came from Heller. He understands that too.

Today’s Kindness Reminder:
Play with your children. Make them laugh. Show them your heart, and let them show you theirs. There is no greater force that can ever pull that away!